Sunday, April 10, 2011

Going Camping!

Me and LuLu are excited!!! We are going to go on our first camping trip of 2011!
I am trying to decide who gets to go this time...Dirty Bear, New Squirrel, or the Snowman I got for Christmas. The Blob Boys will never go camping again. They are trouble!!! One of them ran away last camping trip and we found him behind the camper, headed for the woods!!!

 Here is a family picture of the Blob Boys. LuLu says their smiles are 'insipid'.
We're really not sure that all of them are boys. Especially the green one.  The orange ones are identical twins. The blue one is the one that ran away last year.

The Grandboy and the Grandgirl are going too! YAAAAAAYYYY!!!! The Grandboy sleeps on the top bunk and we pretend it is our hideout!! NO GIRLS ALLOWED!!!!

LuLu can't wait to wear her new shirt. It is a hand-me-down shirt because now that I am a big, muscular pug I can't wear it any more. LuLu likes the shirt very much, even though she doesn't actually like to wear clothes, because it has 1960's graffitti on it. Here is a picture of me and LuLu in her hand-me-down 1960s inspired grafitti shirt.    
I think I look pretty good in this picture. LuLu is smiling, see her teeth? She can't wait to wear her shirt, and she doesn't even like to wear clothes!!!!

She says she is going to pretend she is an activist pug from the 60's counterculteral movement. She says to honor the Free Speech Movement of the 60's, she is going to bark during Quiet Time in the campground. Then she says she is going to practice Environmentalism by pooping deep into the woods where trees fall and no one hears them because there's no one there to listen, and she is hoping my MaMaFigure will take her Doors and Pink Floyd CDs and everyone will gather in the campground field for Woodstock II.  Sometimes we have movie night when it gets dark and she says maybe we will get to watch Billy Jack movies. She sings "Go ahead and hate your neighbor, go ahead and cheat a friend".  And then she sings something about one tin soldier riding away. I don't understand anything she's talking about but then she says she wants me to be a flower child with her. I like flowers! I sniff them and then I pee on them. Awesome!

Here is another picture of us. I made it really big so you can see me. I think I look pretty good in this picture too. I just had a bath and I am real buff. When I am not pretending I am the Commander of a Space Pug Guard Unit, I like to pretend I am a Professional Wrestler named Buff'nStuff.

LuLu says she loves the 1960s. I am real happy with 2011, where I can sit in My MamaFigure's lap and watch American Idol and reruns of the Waltons.

Thank you for reading my blog.


Mister Bean   

Saturday, April 2, 2011

On the Big Porch

It is spring again and me and LuLu have been spending a lot of time out on the Big Porch. We get to bark at the birds at My MamaFigure's birdfeeders, and the wind blowing and the clouds moving. We like the Big Porch!

When My MamaFigure gets home from work and finishes her chores, sometimes she will sit on the porch swing. She brings her mandolin outside and plays it. Here is a picture of her mandolin.

She says she stinks at playing the mandolin and me and LuLu think she is right. I love My MamaFigure, but I wish she would just play the radio.

She plays Sally Gooden and Rank Stranger. Sally Gooden is supposed to be a happy, fast song. It doesn't sound happy or fast when My MamaFigure plays it.

She says Rank Stranger is an old Appalachian Ballad song. It is real sad, it is about a person who comes home after being gone for a long time and nobody knows who he is! My MamaFigure says all the old Appalachian Ballad songs are sad. She sings Rank Stranger when she plays it on her mandolin and it sounds really sad and it makes me want to howl. Here is a picture of me listening to my MamaFigure.

 I think I look pretty good in this picture, even if I am wanting to howl.

Here is a picture of LuLu. She says pugs are not supposed to howl. She says we are yappy little house dogs, bred to adorn the laps of Chinese emperors.

But, I still want to howl. My MamaFigure is coming to the part where she sings "they knew not my name, and I knew not their faces. I found they were all Rank Strangers to me." Here is a picture of me, trying not to howl, concentrating really hard on Dirty Bear, New Squirrel, camping, my favorite place to take a poop, That Man won't let us sit in his new chair, The Grandboy is coming to visit us this afternoon......

Finally, I had to create a diversion so My MamaFigure will stop playing the mandolin badly and singing the sad Appalachian Ballad. So, I run across the Big Porch and start barking. LuLu automatically thinks there is conflict, so she runs across the porch and barks with me. 

My diversion worked. My MamaFigure scolded us and told us to stop barking. Our barking ruined her mandolin moment.  She put it back in the case and went inside.   
That Man says he thinks we are good-looking pugs, but he doesn't understand why Chinese emperors bred us to have curly tails. He says they must have only looked at us from the front.  

Thank you for reading my blog.
Mister Bean